Poetify Wrapped 2024
Come for the Crazy, Stay for the Sexy
Welcome to what I’m lovingly going to call my Poetify Wrapped 2024, where I take a brief moment to stop, reflect, and revel in the year or so that was. Think of it as a highlight reel of my poetic exploits thus far, a joyous commemoration of the absurd, the sublime, and everything in between. Frankly, there’s been quite a lot of silliness, and I insist that it continue. Six months on Substack. Twelve months of thoroughly witty wordsmithery. Alongside a whole lot of editing, reading, proofreading, poetry writing, PhD research, thesis writing, lecture planning, and book writing. Let’s dip into some analytics before we get well & truly stuck into a proper gander at some of my favourite reads & posts from this year.
If you haven’t subscribed already, honestly, it’s just rude at this point, get that button clicked and let’s say no more about it. Moving swiftly on!
Now, are you sitting comfortably? Well, let’s see what we can do about that.
The Headlines
Articles posted: 123 - from 11th May 2024 to now, that’s roughly 3.8 posts a week. I honestly don’t know where I get the energy from some weeks! Or why.
Most Read: Introducing: Poet Chaotique — you delicious sods ate this one up as if someone had told you the forbidden fruit had aphrodisiac properties and wasn’t all pomegranates and figs. And given that this one is almost exclusively about yours truly, I am truly, madly, deeply touched.
Most Shared: How Not To Break An Omelette (Break The Eggs) — apparently, you all love your poetry dipped in something thick and saucy, and with plenty of expletives. The things I’ve done for a drizzle of Hollandaise!
One I most enjoyed writing: MemoryGate, York: Theme Park for the Disenfranchised - ah, the one where I ranted at length about my hometown being a glorified theme park for the masses of clueless tourists propped up by coffee shops and union-flagged tat masquerading as “culture”. York Minster is made of 12.2 million meticulously placed matchsticks.
One I almost didn’t share: Persephone does sound kinda hot though - the one where I wasn’t sure I should be saying what I was saying but felt it too necessary to gloss over without saying something at least. Pomegranates at the ready. We’re off down to the pillory!
One where I felt most exposed: Who Ate All The Pies? - this one went a little too deep into my long-term neuroses around body image. As I always say, you’re never too fat for a hat, but you can be cut out of a handbag!
Your Favourites
Top Poem Series: Ex/rotic Fridays. 40 posts and counting! Each week, I have been bringing you something unusually steamy, surreal, or scandalously sublime. Namely all things exotic & erotic. (Don’t think I didn’t notice some of you lurking consistently. Naughty.)
Most Unhinged Post: How to Knacker a Shiraz in 17 Easy Steps — my ode to the glorious multipotential art of mulling, from the neighbour’s cat to Labour MP Diane Abbott. Had to be done. Sorry, Diane.
Do you have a stand-out favourite post of 2024?
Poems published: 31
other. originally published by Hearth & Coffin
White Sage Smoke for the Perpetually Overwhelmed originally published by coalition works
Ways Who Snickle Against Lost Time originally published in Coffin Bell Journal & forthcoming in StepAway Magazine’s “Queering The Landscape” Issue
The Black Sheep of Bootham Bar originally published by Powders Press
Candy Floss Queer originally published by Impostor
Black Treacle Heart (Waffles Optional) originally published in Cape Magazine
Memories from a timeline that never happens originally published in Coffin Bell Journal
Bodies that Made Me Electric originally published in Powders Press
Everybody’s Waiting for the Man with the Bag (Sugar, spice, and all things existential crisis)
Placing Conkers In The Corners of my Mind (to keep the intrusive thoughts from scuttling)
The Cold-Hard Numbers
New Subscribers: 48 (come for the crazy, stay for the sexy, or whatever strangely particular brand of lies you’re telling yourself)
Countries Reached: 10 (Hello, mysterious reader in Iraq!).
Poetry-Adjacent Beverages Consumed While Writing: Fuck knows. I usually have a good few on the go at any one time. One caffeinated, usually cold. One fizzy, often cream soda of some description. One plain and intentionally cold, usually water. Also I was gifted one cup of coffee this year by a very lovely subscriber, so thank you for that, it was thoroughly appreciated! (Button at the bottom of the post, as always, if you’re feeling left out!)
Sex, Death, & Sausage Rolls: A Vibe Check!
Spotify has genres. I have vibes. It’s a poetry thing. Like a group of poets is called a mood.
Most Written About Themes:
Sex - the weirder and darker the better, think grotesque masks and feats of superhuman flexibility with a soundtrack of mostly Mötley Crüe & Blue Öyster Cult. Maybe the umlaut is doing some of the heavy lifting here, who knows?
Death - kinda macabre, but make it sexy, as if sitting in a graveyard like Shelley but with a tit out, like, well it’s Byron realistically, isn’t it?
Food - I have to say I’ve noticed such an alarming rate of food metaphors, in particular, anything pastry or sugar related, in my poetry of late that one of my upcoming collections is lovingly monikered Knocking About Cake in tribute to my great-nana Elsie who baked anything “knocking about” into a cake batter in an ultimate act of Yorkshire ingenuity & thrift.
Books reviewed: 8
Great Demon Kings by John Giorno
Pretty Boys Are Poisonous by Megan Fox
All Down Darkness Wide by Seán Hewitt
And My Blood Sang by Maia Brown-Jackson
Mother Night & These Queer Merboys by Serge ♆ Neptune
closer baby closer & sweetdark by Savannah Brown
Madness, Rack, & Honey by Mary Ruefle
Camp Marmalade by Wayne Koestenbaum
Top 5s of 2024
Favourite Poets of 2024:
Chen Chen,
Hollie McNish,
Kim Addonizio,
CAConrad,
Mary Ruefle.
Favourite Substackers & Publications:
(Honourable mention: Maia Brown-Jackson, who has since left Substack)
Poets read this year for the first time:
Kenneth Rexroth,
Octavio Paz,
Kim Addonizio,
Adrienne Rich,
John Giorno,
among many, many others, of course.
5 Memorable Reads:
Bukowski In a Sundress by Kim Addonizio,
Pity by Andrew McMillan,
Address Book by Neil Bartlett,
The Art of Cruelty by Maggie Nelson,
Pieces of A Boy by Sam Morris.
Top 5 Revisited Books:
The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath,
All Down Darkness Wide by Seán Hewitt,
We Are Parasites by A.V. Marraccini,
Bluets by Maggie Nelson,
A Lover’s Discourse by Roland Barthes.
Books Bought:
Only kidding. There are far, far too many to count, but to give you an idea, I turned roughly two-thirds of my ever-growing poetry collection into a poet-tree for the season! The poetry section makes up pretty much a third of my entire attic library. Some people have a TBR pile, I have a room. It’s full of soft furnishings, moody lighting, and an abundance of snacks. Why? Isn’t yours? And why not? Tut-tut.
So what, what’s next?
Well, hopefully, a lot more of this sort of nonsense. I think there’s going to be a bit of a play about with my posting schedule in the new year to balance out the workload a little better between my own writing and sharing that of other poets. I want to have more time to really get stuck into some collections and respond more fully. I may limit my sharing of poems to the Notes feed. We will see. Otherwise, I’m toying with the idea of either putting audio on my posts or setting them up as a weekly podcast. (I’m holding back slightly, cos I don’t want to be just another man with a podcast!) Maybe there will even be a couple of poetry writing courses coming in 2025 too. I say maybe, as though I haven’t already written them!
All I know is there will certainly be more and more things that come under the categories of exotic, erotic, chaotic, & poetic!
Though I’m also very much open to suggestions and collaborations!
If you’ve enjoyed this jaunty tumble down memory lane for 2024, please hit the like button, share this nonsense far & wide, and invite some kooky friends along for the ride.
Feeling generous? Buy me a coffee with the tip jar below. Let’s keep the poetic pandemonium alive in 2025! I’ll do my part, you have to join in too.
Until next year,
All my love & chaos,
Poet Chaotique.x
very freakin cool lineup, reflections, musings etc!! i love this it's like a smorgasbord of delicious word-dinner. and to be included in one of your favs sections!! i'm honoured <3
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